Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Why Are You Wearing That?

And why are you carrying all those bags?

Camera phone was disagreeable, so there are no accompanying photographs but here it is.

Nice lady with (very) pretty hair getting off the train with a lovely burgundy Tod's-style purse and two "black mariahs" as I call the BIG BLACK SLOUCHY gym bags. WTF? Just home from college? No? Then what hell is in the bags? Morning gym and afternoon gym stuff? S.W.A.T. outfits? Bank robbery gear? What? What? You got up this morning, selected a perfectly lovely outfit, styled your gorgeous hair and then strapped three bags all over your ensemble. No I tell you. This must cease. Unless you are an EMT on call 24/7 - you do not need to carry that much stuff!

On the same train: Nice lady apparently auditioning for the James T. Kirk Star Trek Dance Review - black, poly-blend (naturally), CUFFED, wide-legged capri pants and low-heeled boots. Prepping for the next ComiCon? Stop it!

People, it's fashion week - why are you trying to hurt me? See the album I started at NewYork.com This is an album of things I HATE HATE HATE. Ugly. Bad desinger, bad. Shame! You are being sent for a time out!
Ummmm, camouflage shorts over pajama-style leggings and topped with a totally random print poly shirt by Academy of Art. GAH! GAH! No! Nothing says "just released from 10 days of observation" like cami shorts over pajama bottoms. Nice.

I've only gotten through the "A" names, but God there's a lot to hate. The bitter seed was just so easy to be in touch with today.

Maybe I'll start an album of what I love tomorrow.
Mmmmmm. Carolina Herrera. Yum.

Final word to the ladies. It was 42 degrees at 6am this morning. That's a really good indicator that the FLIP FLOPS (including the Jimmy Choo kind) should be put away until next summer. You need proper fall footwear, get thee to the mall.

As Jon Stewart said this very evening:

"You can't plough a field with a muskrat." Stop trying to conduct business in silly clothing.

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