Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Boston Red Sox v. Minnesota Twins

I enjoyed ten innings of Spring Training baseball (from my comfy chair as I am not in Florida this week.) The Sox and the Twinkies tied after 10 innings, but all I ask on Spring Training Opening Day is anything other than complete foolishness. Not a lot of highlights - but nothing too embarrassing either (I am not going to fault Julian Tavares for the home run - a one time pass...) After getting out of the first three months of winter (and suffering since the second week of January) my mind is quite ready for baseball season. The first few weeks at Fenway are what we refer to as "winter ball" - you must be prepared for cold nights, but to watch the team playing in a warm place does my frozen, bitter little heart good.

Speaking of good - The Red Seat has the goods of the season. People, let me have a quiet word with you. We won. We finally won the world series (just as my grampy always said we would) so I'm asking you to take off the "Yankees Suck" t-shirts (even if they do) and use them to wax your cars. It's Boston peeps - we are supposed to be smarter than that witless piece of trash. Try something classy from The Red Seat.

I totally want this print and all of their t-shirts. So come on fans - it's a new season, a new team - let's upgrade your sporting wardrobe.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Pilobolus Ruled

The Pilobolus Dance Theater was perfect during the Oscar telecast. Humorous, amazing and not at all annoying like the gigantic dance extravaganzas of the past. I won't object to future Debbie Allen-choreographed shows, but it was nice to have something so modern and completely different. Here's the clip from YouTube - I've watched it like 20 times. The most startling routine was for The Departed. What say you?

Monday, February 26, 2007

Moments I Missed on Oscar Night

Really Kelly Preston, Scientology gives you the confidence to leave the house looking like this? That is awesome. Totally.

Because she's Sally frigging Kirkland, that's why. You're an idiot for even asking.

Someone named Isla Fisher. How long till the nip slip pix appear in the tabs?

Really, my zombie husband Mark told me I look beautiful in my caftan. Really. Really he said so.

Naomi - is a New Orleans flapper costume the best you could do? It's not Mardi Gras, it's the Oscars.

Hey! It's the full-height Katie doll! I guess Tom replaced the shorter one from Italy. Are his hands glued to her dress? WTF?

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Oscar Live Blog

*Updated update - continues to move stuff around totally screwing up my links. I'll try to fix them ASAP. Godalmighty.

***I'M WORKING ON IT - overnight added more pix to their site and screwed up all the photo numbering (that's why you got Leo instead of Forrest when you clicked on the link) STILL WORKING ON IT - they seem to have settled down on the moving of photos - but a few links keep changing. Think of it as a challenge or a special guest celebrity filling in for the one you clicked on! Cool!

Oscar Telecast Live Blog (in reverse order)

12:00am - 12:17am

Ellen vacuuming the carpet in the front of the theater and telling Penelope Cruz to move her dress and informs the audience that someone dropped their rolling papers. Announces it was the band.
Reese Witherspoon out in a stunning gown - she looks fantastic (if a bit pointy) and is out to introduce the Best Actor WINNER: Forrest Whitaker for The Last King of Scotland. Thanks everyone and God - remembers to thank his wife.

George Lucas, Francis Ford Coppola and Steven Spielberg out to announce the Best Director WINNER: Martin Scorcese - who has to win it now that the "three amigos" are on stage. Speilberg has the envelope and announces Martin Scorcese the The Departed! I enjoyed The Departed, but I think this is the "about frigging time award" - I would have gifted it for The Aviator. Marty gets a standing ovation and seems nervous like the band might start to play him off. Asks that the boys "check the envelope." Thrilled that his friends are presenting the award. Marty is flipping out with thanks. Tells his 7 year old son he can stay up for ten more minutes. Great shot of the four directors walking off stage. Nicholson gives Scorcese a big hug back stage.

Diane Keaton and Jack Nicholson out to present Best Picture WINNER: The Departed

11:51 - 11:57pm

Ellen in sateen tuxedo pants and vest joking that the show is over and she brought it in on time. The suit is unforgiveable. Introduces Philip Seymour Hoffman who needs a hairstylist (he's got a little Nick Nolte going on) out to introduce Best Actress WINNER: Helen Mirren for The Queen. She is so cute "I've got my purse in one hand and my earring in the other." She is so fabulous in sharing her award with the other actresses and all of the filmmakers. She salutes the queen and her dignity.

Pilobolus out to enact The Departed - fanastic!!!

11:34 - 11:49pm

Ellen introducing 2-time Oscar nominee Will Smith who presents a reel of films that seemingly relate in no way to the evening's proceedings.

Kate Winslet out to present Best Film Editing WINNER:
Thelma Schoonmaker for The Departed she is giddy and delightful. Jack Nicholson is beaming.

Two-time Oscar winner Jodi Foster out to introduce the reel of people who passed away this year. She is quite choked up.

11:20 - 11:31pm

Jennifer Lopez introduced with "Please welcome film star, recording star and an excellent reason for high definition television?" WTF? JLo introduced the Dreamgirls cast for a number from the film. Jennifer Hudson STUNNING in a read sequin gown she should have worn to the Oscars. Beyonce looks beautiful (though I hate the Cinderella dress she is wearing.) Anika Noni Rose is stunning in her red gown.

Ellen introduces John Travolta (a little doughy) and
Queen Latifah (hot!) who are presenting the award for Best Original Song WINNER: Melissa Etheridge for An Inconvenient Truth who thanks her wife and children.

11:06 - 11:17pm

Hugh Jackman and
Penelope Cruz out to introduce Best Original Score WINNER: Gustavo Santaolalla for Babel

Ellen cracking a joke about Jack Nicholson (with shaved head) and Jack enjoying the joke. Sid Gannis, President of the Academy in a 60-second film on the
Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences in Los Angeles.

Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst (in a dress she is already regreting) introducing Best Original Screenplay WINNER: Michael Arndt for Little Miss Sunshine YAY!!!!

Pilobolus Dance troupe enacts Pan's Labyrinth. Very cool.

10:40 - 11:02pm

Gael Garcia Bernal and Eva Green (who has on entirely too much eyeliner) introducing the award for Best Documentary Short WINNER: The Blood of Yingzhou District

Jerry Seinfeld looking swell in his double-breasted tux introducing Best Feature Documentary WINNER:
Davis Guggenheim for Inconvenient Truth Al Gore and Laurie David take the stage with Davis. Davis is so excited and when Al speaks everyone is listening as if to a preacher.

Clint Eastwood looking dapper with a red pocket square speaking about Ennio Morricone's music for the film A Fistful of Dollars and how it changed the film. Ennio sitting with Quincy Jones (who is wearing quite a swank China silk smoking jacket.) Ennio is honored with a special Oscar for his film scores. Clint accidentally announcing "I should have worn my glasses".

Totally random introduction: Celine Dion performing the world premiere of "I Knew I Loved You." She dosen't look bad, but I'm muting the TV right now. On second glance I hated the performance dress so I put up the arrival dress.

Ennio receives a standing ovation for his award and gives his acceptance speech in Italian. His wife is so cute. I love it. Clint is translating from the teleprompter. Dedicates the Oscar to his wife Maria. So sweet.

10:20 - 10:37pm

Ken Watanabe escorting Catherine Deneuve (and man he knows how to enter with a lady) to introduce the award for Foreign Language Film. Showing a clip reel of famous foreign films - a bit bland, like a college overview.

Clive Owen (without a tie, so I hate it) and Cate Blanchett looking stunning in her (surprise this year) single shoulder gown.

Best Foreign Language Film WINNER: Germany - The Lives of Others

Robert Downey, Jr. and Naomi Watts introduced visual effects. Robert cracks a joke about the 90s that Naomi doesn't get. Hah.

Achievement Visual Effects WINNER: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Ellen doing shadown puppets. Now being consumed by Pilobolus Dance troupe as they enact Snakes on a Plane. Fantastic!

Two words, George Clooney who says "I was just backstage with Vice President Al Gore and Jack Nicholson drinking and I don't think he's running". Crowd laughs. God he's handsome. He's reading the nominees for supporting actress.

Best Actress in a Supporting Role WINNER: Jennifer Hudson for Dreamgirls (I'm happy she took off the little jacket thingy - she looks way better now.) They are letting her run long. Shouts out thanks to Jennifer Holliday too as the orchestra starts to play her off.

9:58 - 10:16 pm

Ellen comes on stage with what she is calling her Oscar "Baby Bjorn" so that winners have a place to put their Oscar while reaching for their notes - and for the after party.

Anne Hathaway and Emily Blunt enter to present the award for costume design. On second glance I am not loving Anne's dress. LOVE the way they are showing off the costumes live - that is a nice change of pace.

Best Costume Design WINNER: Milena Canonero for Marie Antoinette (in an unfortunate choice of costume herself - hate the bad tuxedo.)

Tom Cruise in bad tux with improper tie with ill-fitting shirt introducing the
Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award being given to Sherry Lansing.

Ellen working the aisles again in a white tuxedo (hideous) chatting up Clint Eastwood (who is asking if she has a script for him) now asking Steve Spielberg to take a photo for her MySpace page. Love it. Asking him to retake it - crowd loves it.

Gwenyth Paltrow - hair looking lovely (boobies could have used some direction in the copper colored dress) with the nominees for

Achievement in Cinematography WINNER: Guillermo Navarro for Pan's Labyrinth

Pilobolus Dance troupe introduces Little Miss Sunshine in a very artful way.

9:46 - 9:48pm

AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME American Express commercial with Wes Anderson. Damn I liked that! (
Bottle Rocket, Rushmore, Royal Tennenbaums)

9:42 - 9:54pm

Ellen making use of recycled jokes "because the show has gone green" introducing Cameron Diaz in a dress I still hate (thought I do love the shoes). Cameron introducing Best Feature Animation WINNER:
George Miller for Happy Feet

Academy Award winning screenwriter Ben Affleck - looking good (not puffy at all) - but I like a bow tie on a man in a tux introducing the screenwriting.

Helen Mirren and Tom Hanks (another one without a proper tie) introducing:

Best Adapted Screenplay WINNER: William Monahan for The Departed

Starts off by saying "Valium does work" and Lawrence of Arabia was what inspired him to write.
9:30 - 9:38pm

Randy Newman and James Taylor singing "Our Town" from the film

Melissa Etheridge singing the theme to
An Inconvenient Truth. Nice. No comment on outfit.

Al Gore and Leonardo di Caprio (who asked him if there was anything he wants to announce - to great applause). Announcing the show has "gone green" and inviting people to visit to get the link to the National Resources Defense Council (
NRDC). Leo asking again and Al pretending that he's going to announce he's running for President. The orchestra now playing him off for a laugh.

9:12 - 9:28pm

Ellen clarifying her remark about Dame Judi Dench missing the Oscars because she was having a face lift - Ellen announces that was wrong and she meant to say a boob job.

Steve Carrell and Greg Kinner (both looking quite dashing) introducing the award for:

Best Sound Editing WINNER: Letters from Iwo Jima

James McEvoy and Jessica Biel (
in a dress I loathe) introducing Best Sound Mixing WINNER: Dreamgirls

8:53 - 9:07pm

Will Ferrell (sporting a mini 'fro)singing "A Comedian at the Oscars" with Jack Black. Now they've got John C. Reilly singing with them - very charming and funny. They are cracking the audience up - a rarity at the Oscars. Crowd is giving it up to them.

Achievement in Make-up Winner:
Pan's Labyrinth

Abigail Breslin and Jaden Smith introducing nominees for Best Animated Short WINNER: The Danish Poet and Best Live Action Short WINNER: West Bank Story

Rachel Weisz in a dress I'm okay with (waiting for the boobies to pop out) introducing Best Supporting Actor WINNER: Alan Arkin for Little Miss Sunshine

Ellen working the aisles and offering Martin Scorcese her screenplay. He says "I'm interested" and takes it from her.

Pilobolus Dance Theater introduces Happy Feet.

Dove Cream Oil commercial winner - Lindsay Miller of Sherman Oaks, California.

8:30 - 8:50pm

Interesting way to start the show with a little chat video with the nominees.

Ellen Degeneres in burgundy velvet tuxedo - which I don't mind - but I hate the white shoes. She's doing very well - love the half a box of chardonnay line. "It's my job to relax you. To not remind you that it's a make or break night." "You should worry that there's a billion people watching." "It's not that we don't have time for long speeches, we don't have time for boring speeches."

Abigail Breslin of of Little Miss Sunshine looks lovely in her dress.

Peter O'Toole enjoying himself - 8 nominations.

The crowd giving it up big time for Al Gore. Fantastic.

Ellen calling out Leonardo di Caprio "because I think the ladies wanted to look at you."

Jennifer Hudson glowing and looking nervous.

Ellen "If there weren't blacks, Jews and gays, there wouldn't be any Oscars."

Gospel choir with Ellen and a tamborine - making people get up out of their seats.

"I would not want to follow that..."

Nicole Kidman (glowing) and "James Bond" Daniel Craig (looks sharp, but dry as toast) introducing the award for Best Art Direction Winner: Pan's Labyrinth

Maggie Gyllenhaal STUNNING in her one shoulder dress congratulating the techhie award winners.

Road to the Oscars pre-show (8-8:30pm)

Leonardo di Caprio looking stylish in his tux and slicked back hair.

Lisa Ling should take that black poofy dress back to its author. Terrible.

Nicole Kidman in a gorgeous red gown (happy she's wearing anything but white!) with a bow at the shoulder.
Naomi Watts in pale yellow - looking washed out. Why girls - why do you fall for the pale yellow gowns?

Andre Leon Talley with Jennifer Hudson - great dress and shoes - hate the short jacket. She is glowing.

Steve Carrell kidding accusing Greg Kinnear of intense body odor (during the filming of Little Miss Sunshine.)

Emily Blunt (Devil Wears Prada) in blue sequins (not in love with it, likely to fall down)
Ann Hathaway not looking awful in the white dress with black bodice. Patricia fields in burgundy hair and crazy red dress.

Penelope Cruz looks amazing as always.

Andre Leon Talley with
Will and Jaden Smith and wife Jada Pinkett Smith who is performing in the film Pursuit of Happyness with his dad.

Cameron Diaz in a terrible 1980s dress. OMG - it's Valentino? GAH. No, no, no I cannot allow this trend to continue. I do love her earrings. Did she have a little work done?

Eddie Murphy and Tracy Edmonds - Eddie looks perfect in his one button tux. Tracy is stunning but I am not in love with the Star Trek dress.

Andre Leon Talley with Cate Blanchett who is gorgeous and stunning as always.

Ryan Gosling with his sister and his mother. Camera angle not flattering on the family. Sis looks great in the one shoulder red dress.

Mark Walberg looking quite hot in his tuxedo. Shout out from Boston Marky Mark!

The three Mexican directors nominated for Oscars are having fun and making jokes that will be misunderstood across America.

Kate Winslet looking AWESOME in a wintergreen one shoulder gown - perfect skin as always - very dramatic.

Lisa Ling is an idiot - who sports a pony tail to the Oscars? WTF?

Helen Mirren in Christian Lacroix looking stunning. The bodice is a bit chest enhancing - but what the hell, at 61 and nominated for an Oscar she can do anything she wants.

Andre Leon Tally lisping through the Oscar fashion show.

Penelope Cruz, wild but gorgeous dress
Jennifer Lopez - awful dress, fire the designer. I don't think you mean to look like Jaqueline Suzanne.
Portia de Rossi - get a sandwich. RIGHT FRIGGIN NOW!

Maggie Gyllenhaal post-baby looking stunning

Jodi Foster, I've missed you but I hate this dress.
Al and Tipper Gore looking fab!

Oh Cameron Diaz - what year is it in your closet?
Jennifer Hudson, you are gorgeous - that little jackety thing is terrible.

Oscar Sunday!

Some things for today, Sunday February 25th.

In the words of Make the Logo Bigger "Die SNL, die." I love Rainn Wilson on The Office, but I'm pissed that I forced myself to stay awake to watch that recycled piece of crap last night.

But what do you mean Magno? Why so glum? Here's why so glum. I bet if you called my sister she could still sing "Chevy" from the first season. Gilda Radner, Larraine Newman and Jane Curtain sang this fabulous little ditty: "Chevy, Chevy I love when you fall down, each Saturday night on my TV, oh yes but Chevy, every time you take that fall, I wish that you were falling, for me."

Yeah - I remember it - my sister and I sang it together. The SNL girls crooned that tune in 1977 and the quality was seared into my childhood receptors. Not a tag line - not ad copy - the whole song. I could still recite dueling Brandos if there was money on the line.

It seems to me that the majority of the sketches (back then) were true to narrative form with a beginning a middle and an end. They weren't "played off" by the band because they couldn't come up with a damn ending. "Concept" humor is fine (occasionally) but you can't pull off a 90 minute with nothing but concept humor. I love Amy Poehler - I think she's a "hot ticket" in the parlance of my parents, but you may not use Weekend Update to toss out the one-liners that were used to pitch sketches that didn't make it into the show. STOP THAT. Make up some fake news, get Jon Stewart or dump the sketch. That's all I have on SNL.

I'll be livebitching liveblogging the Oscars tonight. There will definitely be a wardrobe watch, but I love the Oscars telecast - it's riddled with opportunity for shame and stupidity.

In other award news, the Razzies were handed out yesterday to those deserving souls who spend millions and millions of dollars on poorly written, poorly executed crap by studios that passed on gems like Little Miss Sunshine. Handed out with malice I hope. Also the Independent Spirit Awards (after the Golden Globes my favorite awards) were presented yesterday - you can read all about it at the ISA website. No spoilers from me.

Commercial that is annoying me right now: The Meineke mid-winter sale where idiot son asks his dimwitted parents "Who should I Marry, Chole, Liz or Jill." It must be very hard on parents when their children are having bizarre visions that only they can see. Where is George Foreman when you need him?

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Tastes Like Chicken

I'm watching the "who screwed up in marketing and communications this week" news on my local cable station NECN. They lead with JetBlue, who after the maelstrom seems to be okay. They do a short piece on the TJ Maxx ever-growing "we didn't know data could be compromised like that" story. They move onto a bad idea from Cadbury-Schweppes - another idiotic marketing stunt with the grand prize being hidden in the nearly 400 year old historic Old Granary Burying Ground. No, the the bomb squad didn't blow anything up this time, but "hello?" the advertising community should maybe focus on Baltimore or St. Louis or Albuquerque for the next rounds of stupidity. NECN finishes with a quick piece on the KFC/Taco Bell rat story.

All of this was wrapped in a crisis-manager opinion blanket. How could these companies have managed their situations better? The crisis manager people suggest these four things to stave off the snowball effect:

- Respond quickly - with facts
- Apologize
- Give assurances and clear steps for correction
- Learn from your mistakes
They gave JetBlue props for its handling of the blizzard screw up, smacked KFC over the rats and hit TJ Maxx the hardest for virtually not responding to the problem.

All of this was really useful after a hellish week for some marketers. My husband's take on the KFC thing was to ask if those qualified as "free range rats" or other KFC menus items that had not yet been cooked. I'm wondering if they aren't just drumsticks we haven't met.

Friday, February 23, 2007

My Brush with (Marketing) Greatness

Author and customer evangelist Jackie Huba brought her "Citizen Marketers - When People are the Message" tour to Digitas Boston today. I was fortunate to get a seat to witness her fantastic presentation. The book, co-written by Ben McConnell, is a startling and interesting read about our new social media world with some recommendations on how to process all of the changes.

Jackie beautifully illustrated the book's concepts with an excellent multimedia presentation and she gamely braved the after-show questions with honest answers and a book signing. I can highly recommend the book - you do not have to be in advertising to appreciate the ever-changing ways in which we communicate, and how citizen marketers are cutting out the middleman.

You can read my blurb on The Digital Hive here.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

My Consumer Aggravation Continues

My next post is up at the Digital Hive Blog wherein I compare and contrast the response of JetBlue to the crisis of their own making (okay, with some help from a giant blizzard) and the response of TJ Maxx to the crisis that they seem powerless to stop (but I don't think they are really trying.)

JetBlue seems to have derailed legislation about airline passenger treatment (at least for now) and TJ Maxx is the subject of class action lawsuits. My own congressman has asked the FTC to look into the data breach situation and how we can protect consumer privacy. Bravo Congressman Markey, bravo.

Bad TJs, bad.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

JetBlue's Giant Blue Cojones

My next post is up at the Digital Hive Blog wherein I applaud the giant cojones of JetBlue CEO David Neeleman.

I can totally give a guy props for having the guts to face the music when it comes to a gigantic customer service screw up that revealed every flaw in the company's infrastructure. For punishment he had to post an apology on YouTube and tape a segment with Matt Lauer. I'm not sure which is worse. You also get to learn about my super-sucky American Airlines experience from 2003 called "Yours Is A Very Bad Airline."

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Mitt Romney - A Legend In His Own Mind

Mitt Romney "business legend?" WTF? Are you shitting me. As much as it gags me - I had to post this piece of crap.

Worst. Governor. Ever.

This is the real shit Mitt.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Evil Has Two Faces

The creep on the left is former Massaschusetts weasel governor Mitt Romney's former "Loathsome $150,000 $160,000 a year spokesman" (according to Ben at the somewhat dormant Romney is a Fraud blog.) The creep on right is Sam Ewen, CEO of Interference Marketing - the asshats who sents morons on a mission to post lite brites on highway supports and under bridges (who knew people would overract? Duh you jackass, duh.) You can read today's interview with the Asshat-in-Chief at Brandweek. I don't know what Romney's spokesweasel is doing - but I'm sure it's bad, and he's probably lying about it.

The asshat resemblance is eerie.

It's Six Degrees Out

With a windchill of -10 to -20 you would think that folks would put a hat on their stupid heads. I mean really people - your hair is just not that good.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Love The Caption

From Spring Training in Fort Myers, FLA.

Love the caption: Curt Schilling and Daisuke Matsuzuka shared a laugh.

Really? Did Schilling take up Japanese? Seems more like Dice-K laughing at the thought that Schilling might be pregnant. Or foolish enough to run for US Senate in Massachusetts.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Dove is Pro What?

My next post is up at the Digital Hive Blog wherein I ponder the effectiveness of the new "Dove® is pro.age™" campaign.

At first blush I applaud the boldness. I can forgive the attempt to manufacture controversy with the "commercial that couldn't be shown on TV" because I like the spot. Dove takes the campaign further with a discussion board, which I snarkishly suggest better be 100% legit. Check it out, and if you are a "woman of a certain age" you can sign up for the next casting call.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Meanwhile in Fort Myers...

While I was trying to not have a heart attack while shoveling snowcone-style snow and ice on Wednesday, the Boston Red Sox pitching staff was working out at training camp. I have a reason to live.

I love this photo and caption of Daiske (known in Boston as "Dice K") Matsuzaka. Both of the photos here belong to the Boston Globe Staff Photo/Jim Davis, but unless you are a serious Sox fan you might have missed them - and I think they are so beautiful.

Caption: When he was finished and headed back to the clubhouse, Matsuzaka paused and bowed toward the field before entering the dugout.

Bring it on you Yankee mofos. Bring it. Hai!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Run Al Run!

Al Franken officially entered the race for US Senate - running for the Minnesota seat now held by the deliriously doufusy Norm Coleman, but formerly held by Al's political hero the late Senator Paul Wellstone (unless you count Dean Barkley who held the position for 2 months after crazy-person/Governor Jesse Ventura appointed him to replace Senator Wellstone.)

Why do I care about a Senate race in Minnesota? I care because it will be a truly interesting race. I think Al is absolutely sincere in his desire to help his fellow Minnesotans. Check out the website, hear his story and report back.

In the meantime, run Al, run. Knock that silly smile off Normy's face.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

While I Shoveled

Happy Valentine's Day. Boston got the wicked storm - and my town, which is slightly northwest of the city got nailed all day - so I worked from home. The storm started out with fluffy little snow, and 4-6 inches piled up pretty quickly. Tom went out with the snowblower and shovel and took care of our extensive grounds. (Actually, since our home is on a corner, we do have a tremendous amount of sidewalk to keep clear.) Tommy spent a couple of hours clearing the driveway and paths around the house. I figured I would do an afternoon shift or two. Since I had a number of conference calls today, I planned a 2:30 shoveling break. OMG - by the time I went outside the snow was just turning to rain, so I was shoveling fast as it was getting heavier by the minute. Then the rain got a little icy - like bitter nonpareils. And when I was on the north side of the house and the wind was howling toward my face it finally turned to daggers - daggers I tell you. Total heart attack snow. We cleared as much as we could before we went out to dinner. We have returned to find every concrete surface now has a one inch coating of pure ice. Dammit.

Chart made especially to celebrate David Armano's blog birthday.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Valentine's Day is Wednesday

From Jessica Hagy's Indexed blog (which I heart.)

What are you getting for Valentine's Day? See the post HERE
Earlier today------------------------------------------------------------------------

Best line from an office kitchen (overheard while on my way to candy machine):

"I think March 18th is Steak & a B.J. Day."


Monday, February 12, 2007

Commercials That Irritate Me

Nutri-system - Dan Marino ad where one of the men announces "My wife doesn't think I'm disgusting anymore." You sir, remain disgusting.

Aleve - Commercial where basketball man says he "Plays headgames with my son" and "My wife is a sore loser." You sir, are an ass.

Jennie-O Turkey - How will you be inspired ad - trying to work fashion into turkey stir-fry dinners. Lady, I don't know what you are on, but that beatific smile indicates you are on some mood altering substance.

I really like this ad:

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Grammy Live Blog

11:00 - 11:30pm EST

Chris Rock introducing Red Hot Chili Peppers making a Justin Timberlake "Junk in a Box" joke. Flea dressed like a Laker. Hah! Anthony in manpris. I would have loved a "California" live performance. Big sign that says "Love to Ornette Coleman" on the speakers behind Flea. Crowd momentarily confused by confetti. Too much confetti for the cameras now. Pretty subdued performance by the Chili Peppers. Al Gore and Queen Latifah. Queen Latifah getting the crowd to cheer Al (and they do.) Best Rock Album: Red Hot Chili Peppers for Stadium Arcadium. Flea is so so funny; love to all, peace and goodwill. You kids get out there and start rock bands. Don Henley and Scarlett Johnansson (in a terrible dress) to present Alburm of the Year: Dixie Chicks - Taking the Long Way Home. Natalie Maines is officially speechless. Shouting "I'm Ready to Make Nice" and "I think people are using their freedom of speech here." Now teary and greatful for people who used their vote to support them for speaking out. Nice, fantastic, very cool - bravo to you NARAS. Bravo for your guts and standing up for what is right.

10:30 - 11:00pm EST

David Spade and Rihanna - love the David Bowie joke. Runaway Love - Ludacris I'm not sure about the rap, it looks a little "Tea Partay" in the tux. Mary J. Blige - please stay away from the pantsuit - not horrible, but really not good. Nice number overall. James Blunt dedicating his performance to Ahmet Ertugan, very sweet. He looks nervous, which would be totally understandable. Jennifer Hudsun - two words for you: FOUNDATION GARMENTS. Shame on your stylist. Robyn Troup is being called to the stage. Justin Timberlake is whining through "Ain't No Sunshine" - definitely not loving her dress, but she's doing well. Needs to work on the stagecraft with the mike - it's in front of her face. Now T.I. joins in loking like he just got off his kitchen job. What is the rag hanging out of your pocket? Robyn is doing well including the dance moves in dangerous shoes. Mary J. Blige got her purse back from Fergie. Quentin Tarantino looks like a nutbag - what the hell is that medal? Tony Bennet amused until he Tarantino announced age 80. Record of the Year goes to: Dixie Chicks for Not Ready to Make Nice - thanking everyone. OMG - Wendy's is using the Violent Femmes "Blister in the Sun"?


Samuel L. Jackson and Cristina Ricci. Cristina, you get an A+ for the outfit, though I would have loved to see a little blush on your cheeks. Introducing Smokey Robinson who seems a little nervous. Could be the satin pants. Please stay away from the plastic surgeon Smokey - it looks like they made it impossible for you to blink. Lionel Richie is it time for you to come back? Is it me or does he have more hair than he used to? Chris Brown - I like the percussion and dance aspect of the production number, but hate the skull mask, light strobe is making me dizzy. Kid dancers were so cute. Troupe is very good - hand off crotch please. Exciting show, but not very musical. Christina Aguilera in a terrible outfit/tribute to James Brown. Hair is a cotton candy disaster. I would have been happier with a video montage to James and not that screeching off key high note from CA. Jamie Foxx with a a polite "that wasn't too bad" face after her performance. Neil Portnow President of the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences comes on to nice applause. Introduces high school kids who are scorching the place with their performance. Nice talk on music education and encouraging peeps to visit so they can hook you up with your legislators to fight for more music education funding. Farewell tribute montage - so many legends left us last year. Don't know who the dude who just danced to the James Brown clip was but that was cool. LOVED that they brought out his sequined cape and hung it on the mikestand with the overhead pinspot. Beautiful.

9:30 - 10:00pm EST

Terrence Howard always looks handsome. I love that he is speaking about Maria Callas. A down to earth Diva with 8 nominations - I love that intro for Mary J. Blige. Oh my Mary, that is a beautiful dress. I would love to know how she feels about the tatoos now. Powerful performance - you are fabulous. Luke Wilson, you are a cute dork. Mandy Moore, I'm sorry you will regret that outfit tomorrow. LeAnn Rimes - you do not need a dress slit to your navel to prove you have grown up. I'm not against cleavage - but it has to be good cleavage. Best Country Album: Dixie Chicks again! Fantastic. Natalie, I'm not loving the dress you changed into. Natalie quoting The Simpsons "Ha Ha" and saying a lot of people just turned their TVs off and then giggling. I love that they are who they are. Ellen and Portia look fab. Seat fillers wandering in behind Reba McEntire. Not so sure about Reba's dress. Tribute to Bob Wills - Carrie Underwood is that a wig or a weave? Your voice is lovely, that dress should be returned to the Dollywood Museum right now. Rascal Flatts guy looks like guy impersonating Lance Bass. Didn't dig Hotel California in 1976, so the fluffy cover didn't send me - but the crowd seems to be digging it. Carrie the quick change artist back to perform Desperado in tart earrings and black gown that would be better on Beyonce. When do you have to return the hair to Christina Aguilera? Rascal Flatts and Carrie back to perform Life in The Fast Lane like they were at a junior high talent show. Natalie Cole and Ornette Coleman - very cool. The last time I saw him he played with the Grateful dead at Boston Garden in 1994. Swanky suit and he deserves his lifetime achievement award. Carrie wandering to her seat with a bottle of water in the background. Imogene Heap what is on your head. Carrie Underwood is not surprised she won. She's high fiving over it. She should have kissed Ornette Coleman on the cheek when he handed her the award.


Shakira and Wyclef Jean - nice! Nice production number! Nice backflip Wyclef! Your drawers are hanging down now though. Shakira knows what color a tan should be - starlets take note. Seal, not loving the jacket, Burt you look fab - how cute are you to ask if you can write a song with Seal. Alpert & Moss totally deserve their award. What's up the announcer butting in? (I assume the intro blurbs are all taped - get your finger off the trigger sound engineer dude.) Song of the Year goes to: Dixie Chicks! Great balls of fire NARAS - you have big old guts, I'm so proud of you! Congrats Chicks! Big and Rich - you are jerkfaces for not clapping. Note to you: When you see the camera pointed at you and the red light is on - tape is rolling, fake it you dopes. How I Met Your Mother Girls - you look very nice. Congrats Grateful Dead. Gnarls Barkley - LOVE the dress-up flight outfits. Nice production number. Kanye - the hood looked stoopid (as the youths would say) other man you are very handsome. Okay now I know who T.I. is. Congrats Ludacris, you look very nice in your suit. Sunglasses off please. Special shout out to Oprah and Bill O'Reilly HAH HAH HAH! Love it!!!! I think I'm voting for Robyn Troup.

8:30 - 9:00pm (EST)

Fergie looked better in the Candies Shoes commercial on the break. Justin Timberlake looks like a cancer patient in the stupid knit hat. He also looks like a kid I went to Junior High School with in that outfit - dump the vest skippy. His band sounds good. WTF is up with the webcam of Timberlake's nose? More nauseating than I could have imagined - and narcissistic too. OMG - Pink looks great on that dress. T.I. who are you? I wish Pink wasn't dead-reading. The doors deserve their lifetime honor. No T.I. - I don't dig. Beyonce shy - Mary J. Blige clapping for her name, Natalie waving and Idia.Arie with fabulous locks and earrings. Congrats again Mary - the girl is going to melt down before the night is over. Jimmy Hendrix for Verizon - that is so wrong. Lil' John for Heineken? For street cred there's MasterCard? Ouch. Stevie Wonder overjoyed - love the vamp Stevie! Corinne Bailey Rae you looked so beautiful and like you were enjoying the moment, I'm glad you opened your eyes and looked around a bit. John Legend that is a fantastic jacket and you sound just wonderful. John Mayer I like your music, you played beautifully - you don't have to look like a dime store Johnny cash in an ill-fitting blazer. Nelly, Nicole and scary girl from Pussycat dolls - get thee to a stylist. Congrats John Mayer freaking out - the best dork winner face of the night - it's understandable you were blanking out.

8-8:30pm (EST)

The Police actually rehearsed! Tony Bennet & Stevie Wonder deserved the Grammy. Joan Baez looked fantastic. The Dixie Chicks were perfect, Natalie Maines is stunning, but I hope she shreds that dress after tonight. Hey it's Prince! In a bouffant! Beyonce is beautiful and can sing, but should burn that dress - she couldn't walk in it. Why do these stylists try to make everyone a mermaid? Black Eyed Peas - Fergie, stand up like a lady and get out of the damn tanning booth. Booker T. & the MGs deserve more than a lifetime achievement award. Congrats Mary J. Blige - you looked stunning and genuinely shocked. I love that you brought your purse on stage and then took out your cards and handed the bag to Fergie. Make sure you get it back from her. How dare they try to play you off. Queen Latifah - girl, I love you - but you have to stay away from the strapless gowns! Ooh, good luck girls who want to sing with Justin (Africa, Brenda and Robyn!)

Remnants of Saturday Night's Dinner Party

Tom cooked an excellent Short Ribs with Tagliatelle for our friends Sam and Nancy Jane. Fabulous meal, great debate and Martha's chocolate tart with an excellent Sauterne. Perfect.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Spinazzola, Marketing & Divas Uncorked

I attended the 22nd Annual Spinazzola Wine & Food festival on Friday night in Boston. The Spinazzola Foundation mission is to "feed hungry bodies and minds" through grants to hunger relief agencies and programs for the homeless. Another mission is to educate the next generation of chefs through a program called C-CAP (Careers Through Culinary Arts Programs.) Both are truly worthy of major fundraising events, but this annual event is superb in its execution with dozens of Boston's best restaurants providing small tastes and dozens of wineries and distributors pouring fabulous wines. The MIT stage band provided great tunes to eat by. The disco inferno dance floor had me cracking up - I love to watch people in tuxedos dance.

American Express was the big name sponsor of the event and it is a perfect match. AMEX wants you to dine out (using their card of course) and they want you to dine at swank places. They came up with a great promotion for Spinazzola - "American Express Presents - Dine at Six Gala Restaurants" between now and the end of June using your AMEX card (spend $500 in total) and they will give you a ticket to next year's Spinazzola gala (that's a $250 ticket.) AMEX has successfully and seamlessly linked themselves with the best restaurants in town and with a terrific organization. Nice.


The winners in the promotional/marketing material competition that I was secretly holding are:

Hogue Cellars a company previously unknown to me, who produced a jazz CD compilation titled "Washington Sounds." The CD package talks about the region of Washington where the wine is produced and features a tremendous group of Washington State artists such as Billet-Deux, Neil Andersson who is also a member of Pearl Django, Supersones, Hot Club Sandwich and Zazou. The CD is a swingy jazzy blast of cool that I will totally play at my next dinner party (and people will ask "What is that CD, and I will tell them where I got it.) Congrats to Hogue for joining my passions in one promo. Smart! The wine was lovely too!

Gallo Family Vineyards takes the silver medal. Yes, that "We will sell no wine before it's time" Gallo (though the GFV brand is the upscale product line.) On the table beside the slickly produced (if slightly confusing) brochure about their Healdsburg tasting facility and wine club were basil seeds and thyme seeds in packets that look like Gallo brand wine labels with the phrase "Never Stop Growing" across them. As a promo - it totally worked for me.

Stonyfield Farm gets an honorable mention for an organic basil seed kit in miniature clay pots ("made from plastic scrap generated in the formation of our multipack cups" according to the label) coupon on the back, naturally. Still, if you found it in the gift bag, you are going to pass it on to a kid or other organic type and Stonyfield gets their name passed around in a sweet way.

Hey! Divas!

Divas Uncorked presented their Mendocino Chardonnay and were the nicest people I spoke to. You can meet all the Divas HERE. You can see my impromptu interview with Carole Alkins and Gert Cowan at YouTube. The Divas are hosting their 4th Annual "Wine, Women & Grape Expectations" conference March 23rd & 24th at the new Westin Boston Waterfront hotel. The conference looks to be fabulous - kicking off with a vintner's dinner and workshops on regional wines, food pairings and consumer tips. The Divas were also kind enough to donate an autographed bottle of wine for the auction (which went for nearly $400!) The ladies presented a lovely Chardonnay. I'm totally starting a Divas category.

My snaps of the event are HERE.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Falling Solidly In the WTF Category

Those crazy-funny Danes bring you bunny jumping? Thanks to Cute Overload.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Not Snickering

My next post is up the Digital Hive Blog wherein I ponder TBWA/Chiat's stupid Snickers commercial and wonder if they bothered to find out who their consumers really are.

I always had my assumptions about the NFL - but since they took down the "Afterthekiss" website, you won't get to see NFL players grimace and make moronic remarks about the commercial. Huh, maybe they do know their consumer after all.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Even Blogs Need Proofreading

Adrants (whom I love) gave me the extra double laugh when they posted this blurb about Dane Cook's promo site. The image attached to the story clearly (in a crappy font) says "Dane Cook's Tourgasm", but that doesn't stop writer Angela Natividad from referring to the comic as "Dean" Cook in four places througout the piece (which has since been corrected EXCEPT for one remaining lowercase "dean".)

Appreciating the laugh from an unexpected place and adding the spelling police category.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007


A real friend will give you his Roast Beef on a roll with Horseradish (lots of it) and eat your Turkey on Wheat with light mayo (with a bite out of it) which turns out to be Turkey on Light Rye (which you hate.)

Monday, February 05, 2007

A Sign of Love

You know how I know my husband loves me?

Today when I got in the car to be driven to the commuter rail station (it was -10 wind chill this morning) he had turned on my seat 6.

Sigh. I shall endeavor to be less bitchy (to him.)

Updating the Stupidbowl

I've added links to my comments from yesterday (LOOK ONE POST DOWN). If you want to see Go Daddy you'll have to Google it - it was so lame I can't even waste the time to hyperlink.

I'm quite disappointed by the Snickers commercial. What an opportunity to not reinforce the stupid male hetero stereotype. Swing and a miss. Feel free to complain about it here:

What was your favorite? What did you hate?

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Live Blogging the Stupidbowl Commercials

My condolences to the Chicago Bears fans. That was a shame. My thoughts on the overhyped stupidbowl commercial extravangaza. Opinions in chronological order from end to beginning. If I didn't mention something, it was either too damn boring to mention or it didn't make me laugh. I'll update links to some of the spots tomorrow. The overall winners, eTrade "Bank Robbery" and "Darts/Training Seminar." Honorable mention for the Oprah/Letterman CBS promo.
Go Daddy - twice? Not funny even once.
eTrade "One Finger" - missed the mark.
IZOD commercial - just okay. Partial credit for balls to run it during the stupidbowl. Budweiser "Jay-Z/Don Shula" - was well done. I don't drink beer, but I wasn't repulsed by the ad. I'm starting to feel bad for Chicago right about now. 9:55 left.
Budweiser "Crabs" - nice execution, but little else. What's with all the animation? I didn't see anything new in the world of animation - that's not to say the level of animation wasn't gorgeous, it was - but what else is it doing to sell the product?
FedEx Ground "Don't Judge/Mr. Turkeyneck" - nope, not even a little funny. FederlineEx "Nationwide", only funny once and I already saw it. Budlight "He's Got an Axe" was amusing. He's got a chainsaw indeed.
Emerald Nuts' "Robert Goulet" - guffaw from me, "That's funny" from Tommy who also said "I kind of feel bad for Robert Goulet." I responded with "He seemed to be having a good time." Tom wants to know if anyone under 40 in my office knows who Robert Goulet is. I'll do an informal survey tomorrow.

POLL RESULTS: In a random poll of 30 surveyed this morning of co-workers between 20-40: only 10% "knew" who Robert Goulet is, 20% "kind of know" who Robert Goulet is and 70% said "who?" Ouch. They do have spectacular commercial recall as they all knew I was referring to the "nuts" commercial.
Tommy and I disagree over Revlon's Sheryl Crow "Not Fade Away" commercial. To quote my husband: "The concept that a rock and roll star has a colorist on tour with them is lame. You used to have a guy go out and score drugs - not a colorist." I have no such issue with having a colorist on staff - I wish we had one at the office. 6:38 left in the third quarter.
The eTrade "Bank Robbery" commercial - OUTSTANDING! The Coca-Cola "Behind the Coke Machine/Happiness Factory" commercial gets major props for clever animation. Very nice.
I liked the Coca Cola "History" spot - but was disappointed that it didn't link out to a microsite to learn more about black history - without it, it's just using black history month for ad purposes.
Halftime review: Prince totally wins the award for best use of a marching band. Was happy to see his sassy dancer girls didn't fall off that rainy, wet stage. What was with the Aunt Jemima head scarf? All Along the Watchtower - really? Have the Jehovah's Witnesses gotten to him that hard?
So far only the Oprah/Letterman promo spot and "Darts (aka Training Seminar)" - loved the security dude "sign out please"... Careerbuilder also has all of the commercials on their site. No other commercials have caused me to stop cooking, eating or writing. And right now there is only 3:57 left in the second quarter. Hope second half rocks.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Giggling with Excitement

Press Release from

February 2, 2007

Los Angeles, CA - In what is no doubt one of the most anticipated moments in rock and roll, VAN HALEN officially announces their 2007 North American tour.

The tour will mark the first time since 1984 that original VAN HALEN front man David Lee Roth will perform with Eddie and Alex Van Halen along with new bassist Wolfgang Van Halen for 40 shows this summer.

VAN HALEN fans can look forward to legendary high intensity performances, featuring a set list of the most iconic hits ever produced by America's premiere rock band.

Eddie Van Halen states, "I am very excited to get back to the core of what made VAN HALEN."

[Please God, let there be a reality show in connection with this tour. I need a reason to watch TV this fall...Amen.]

Friday, February 02, 2007

I Declare the Dumbassery Passé

My next post is up the Digital Hive Blog wherein I declare the short campaign of idiot marketing over.

Those who should reimburse my city are reimbursing, those who should be apologizing are apologizing and those who need a good bath, well, I'm not holding my breath on these idiots.

It's Slinky!

A jingle from my childhood that I remember word for word. Where have all the jingles gone? Where have all the Slinkies gone?